ambivalent

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Македонија на Македонците!
Tadiii.
10tee.
Bisexual.
LA Babyy.
Macedonian.
Personal Blog.
Finding my way in life.
Don't Always Follow Back.

This is Nathalie and Ben.

Chevy is no longer with us so every post after this is what she had opened in tabs. She meant to reblog these, in this order, she just never got the chance.

I cant even right now. Chevy. I’m crying right now and there are no words to express how I feel. I cant imagine what Nathalie is going through during this time. Its true that the good ones always die young. May your soul rest in peace.

my brother is watching your favorite show on Netflix.

my mom is talking about the car you like that’s new to the US.

and me?

i’m just trying to decide if its all worth it.

those emails you used to send me?

those apartments we looked at for us?

the puppy we were going to get?

spending as much time as possible with me?

maybe you don’t, but i sure as hell do.

and sometimes on lonely days i miss him;

then i remember why he’s gone and the pain slowly fades to disgust.

Give me tips on:

sweetpromisesandlies:

*How to get rid of the pain from cavities.

*How to give a BJ.

*Hot to get a B in a class you’re failing in a short matter of 3 weeks.

crushed up my meds and put them in my Arizona Green Tea; almost fucking puked.

i really wish i could swallow pills like the rest of the world = /

thecolorofviolence:

Verbal abuse is still abuse.It’s abuse in the form of words. They still burn, sting, hurt and put us in danger. Don’t assume that a few hurtful words won’t cause them their life. Don’t assume that just because you haven’t put one finger on them, you’re not responsible for what happens after that. Mentally and emotionally, they are bruising, bleeding, suffocating. Your words have power, be careful. Speak life and love.

thecolorofviolence:

Verbal abuse is still abuse.It’s abuse in the form of words. They still burn, sting, hurt and put us in danger. Don’t assume that a few hurtful words won’t cause them their life. Don’t assume that just because you haven’t put one finger on them, you’re not responsible for what happens after that. Mentally and emotionally, they are bruising, bleeding, suffocating. Your words have power, be careful. Speak life and love.

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freaking dylan smashed his dumbass forehead into my nose. it hurtss.

Home. Simple word. Four letters, two consonants, two vowels, one of them silent. Home. You wish you could walk through a familiar door, shout out the word, in a simple two-word sentence: “I’m home!” But that door has been closed to you, slammed shut in your face, and no amount of pleading will open it again. Two consonants, two vowels. One word without meaning when you don’t have a home.

Still here. At least I think so, what’s left of who I used to be a shadow on the sidewalk. I look up, try to find a rainbow, but the only thing there is a lone cloud, stretching thin and thinner, clear to almost not there, across an upside-down sea. I lower my gaze into a puddle, close my eyes at what I see. Don’t want to believe that ghost is me.

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you called me fat. i believed you.

*you said that i am as big as a whale. it still hurts.

I whisper and you close your eyes. I speak and you turn away. If I scream, will you finally hear me beg you to hold me close to you, promise you’ll never let go? Do my tears upset you? Can you see them fall on fallow ground—the soil of your heart? Fear is a better friend than you, who feels nothing, beneath the weight of my pain.